Seen from Afar

Oh gosh.  who is that?  that is her with him.

my heart skips a beat. then it skips another.

damn, she still possesses that power over me.  i cringe inside.  pain floods the senses.

i love my memories but they have a way of controlling me at times

that is not me.  i am unable to stop caring, believing, loving.  i do not want to.  for me, that is who i am.  who i want to be.

love is more than a man and a wife

where is the trail?  the path that continues my journey?  the right direction?  i am lost.  stuck in a moment of time.  that time has now consumed over a year of my life.

i am not done yet

still trying to find myself.  i lived for her. her emotions superseded my mine.  she was my everything.  yes, an unhealthy way to live but when was i ever healthy.  drinking beer, adrenaline junkie, and the wine. ha – good ol’ healthy me.

it’s hard for me when i think about the things that never been
they keep coming back again like they’ve got something to prove

i walk away.  she will not notice me.  i leave her with him.  the person she craved more than me behind the shadows of the i love you’s.  behind the someday let’s get married.  i wanted to believe.

i’ve been running in a circles for days
and you know me… it’s never ever going away

opening my heart for life, love, sex.  you cannot push people away because of the demise of love.

what a big world and i’m glad to be in it
we’ve got a purpose and i’m starting to get it

is this the direction i was supposed to take?  the trail i discussed earlier.  maybe i’m already on it.  oh, the irony.

i know it’s stupid
cause its been so long

i see people. i feel people. the soul, the heart, the raw emotions.  the only thing left to do is to invite them with me on my journey.  and for the stranger to invite me along with them.  a mutual benefit. strength between two random souls that knows no bounds.  for we are the  same.  yet, we are different.

Hey, angels up there help us now

finally, i have reached full Circle.

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